Good Company So, this woman I hardly know, who attends some of the same exercise classes I do, says this to me today: "You're a Good Woman!" Where's that coming from? She hardly knows me! Well, she asked me how many Body Pump (read: really hard strength training)...
Essays
Doing Different
"Where have you been....??!!" I returned recently to attend a fitness class I hadn't been to in a long while. It was a class I used to attend every single week, without fail, for a pretty long time, over a year anyway. So, five people came up to me to ask, "Where have...
What It Takes
I was talking to a friend recently, and she commented that when she first met me (quite a few years ago now), she "didn't get how (I) did it." "It" meaning how I choose and keep up the health-promoting and spiritual practices I do every day. It got me thinking about...
Going For Gold
I admit it. I am a perfectionist. I aim high, and I don't quit. If I can teach a class better, tweak a PowerPoint presentation so it's more interesting, do something more efficiently, or show up better for a workout, I will do it. No excuses. I'm not going to...
A Different Point of View
Positive Offering I think most of us know when to keep our mouths closed. When your opinionated in-law, who always puts you down when you disagree with their political stance, starts talking about the news. When your spouse is trying to bait you into a fight, you're...
As Is
A Good Vent I was listening recently to a friend who was venting about a co-worker's behavior. She was pretty annoyed, and I could understand it. I think most of us would find the other person's behavior objectionable. After blowing off some steam, she moved on to...
Connections
Typical It was a pretty typical Sunday and a typically great day: I got up early so I could go to the gym, take two classes back-to-back, and head home before noon so I could tackle my mountains of unfinished desk work. I do this every week. Also typical was my walk...
Truth-O-Meter
Long before we heard of SARS COV-2, it was a good thing to have a reliable Truth-O-Meter. That unerring inner sense of the rightness of things and the validity of them. An internal measure of the degree of the falseness of a situation, a word, an article, or a person....
Distractor
Class Clown Sometimes when I am teaching a fitness class, I have a participant who distracts the people around them. Class clowns come and go, making side comments and funny faces, telling jokes, and in other ways calling attention to themself and away from me...
Skating Along
One of the biggest things that drew me to becoming a counselor, was an interest in hearing truth. Sure, I had a strong interest in helping people, in making a difference, and in making the world a better place. Psychology has always fascinated me, and I was curious to...
Taking Stock
I don’t know about you, but I really feel for those hard-working people at our local grocery store on a Saturday. Trying to stock shelves with endless lines of customers in their way, veering their trolleys full of product away from inattentive shoppers who back up...
Runaway
Left Behind You may recall the song, “My Little Runaway,” by Del Shannon. Even though it’s a peppy song with a strong beat, it’s a bit sad. A guy whose girlfriend ran away without explaining is upset and wondering why. You can check out the song on YouTube....
On Black Boxes, Brains, and Being at Our Best After Trauma
Black Boxes If Captain Jean Luc Picard gets a little jumpy every time he sees a black cube, you have to forgive him. As the only person who has been assimilated by the Borg and lived to tell, we can assume he has some residual trauma symptoms, as would we (see “Star...
Beyond Wishin’ and Hopin’
What Used to Be By the time you get to about 40, you start seeing what everyone who went before you has already warned you about. Things start repeating. People who vowed to never, ever be like their father are looking in the mirror at his “spitting image.” People,...
From Purging to Pausing
If we have a home with a yard, we may want to cut away the underbrush when bushes are overgrown and choking off the new life. We cut back the trees at the end of the summer to allow a fuller expression of their beauty the next year. We do a clean sweep of the lawn...
A Need to “No”
A Need to "No" ~ We regularly encounter things in our lives that seem really hard to do. Rising to a challenge that seems insurmountable, coping with an unwanted diagnosis, committing to important lifestyle changes, and saying goodbye to someone we care about. Even...
Safe Harbor
Respite~ When times are rough, there are few things better than being held in a beloved friend or family member’s arms. Surrendering to the embrace of someone who really cares and can be there for us seems to make everything okay. The love and acknowledgment of our...
Smile
Email Brain Gym ~ I have this friend who shall remain nameless in this essay. He is the undisputed master of the terse reply. At least in texts and emails. He excels at the one-word answer and has taken to new heights the less-than-complete sentence. I sometimes...
A Meaningful Life
Later in Life ~ I am blessed to work with, play with, and teach lots of people who are past mid-life, many of who are WAY past midlife! I have beautiful and enthusiastic seniors in their 90s who come to me for counseling and who attend my dance, yoga, and exercise...